Week VII - Music by Cheap Trick, "I Want You to Want Me"

The Rolling Skull, Issue 40: October 23, 2009

The Pink Taco Squad continues to march forward with a 6 and 0 record...  What does week VII have in store for the rest of the league?

  -  Goodbye Norma Jean
  -  Blood Brothers Questioned About Last Week's Screw Up
  -  Not Always Safe to Grab a Gator By Its' Tail
  -  The Well Hungarians Get Pounded By MYLF in Week VI
  -  Blunt Force Not Happy About Last Week's Performance

Yours Truly, 

E. A. Presley
RollingSkull, Editor and Chief.

Last week Rumo was contacted by Anna Nicole Smith and asked, "Who played defensive back for the New York Giants before he coached the Cowboys?"  The answer was Tom Landry

Landry became a cornerback in the AAFC in 1949 for the New York Yankees, then moved in 1950 across town to the New York Giants. In 1954 he was selected as an all-pro. He played through the 1955 season, and acted as a player-assistant coach the last two years, 1954 through 1955. Landry ended his playing career with 32 interceptions in only 80 games.

For the 1956 football season, Landry became the defensive coordinator for the Giants, opposite Vince Lombardi, who was the offensive coordinator. Landry led one of the best defensive teams in the league from 1956 to 1959. The two coaches created a fanatical loyalty within the unit they coached that drove the Giants to three appearances in the NFL championship game in four years. The Giants beat the Chicago Bears 47-7 in 1956, but lost to the Baltimore Colts in 1958 and 1959.

In 1960, he became the first head coach of the Dallas Cowboys and stayed for 29 seasons (1960-88). The Cowboys got off to a rough start, recording an 0-11-1 record during their first season and 5 or fewer wins in each of their next four. Despite this early futility, in 1964 Landry was given a ten year extension by owner Clint Murchison. It would prove to be a wise move as Landry's hard work and determination paid off, and the Cowboys improved to a 7-7 record in 1965. In 1966, they surprised the NFL by posting 10 wins, and making it all the way to the NFL championship game. Dallas lost the game to Lombardi's Green Bay Packers, but this season was but a modest display of what lay ahead.

Throughout his tenure, Landry worked closely with the Cowboys general manager, Tex Schramm. The two were together during Landry's entire tenure with the team. A third member of the Cowboys brain trust in this time was Gil Brandt

This week's question from beyond comes from Bob Crane, "Whose NFL playing career began in 1949 and ended in 1975?

a.  Morten Anderson
b.  George Blanda
c.  Gary Anderson
d.  Fran Tarkenton

This week's winner will receive the "Blood Brothers, De-Enhancement."  This product is for male de-enhancement and is guaranteed!  Just look at the way Leland's team went down for the Cunning Linguist last week!  Who in the hell starts Sanchez over Brees?

Please submit your answers to Rumo's handler at plpurvis@bellsouth.net.

Rumo is not to be confused with the choking monkey named Romo...  The same idiot that picked up the emotional baggage of Jessica Simpson!  We understand the Simpson thing, but did Tony Romo work on taking snaps this summer?  RUMOR has it that Jerry Jones had the offensive line learn the Heimlich in preparation for the 2009 playoffs (if they make it.)

Ladies and Gentleman, make sure you rosters are in before 1pm on Sunday! 

     - The trade deadline is just around the corner.  Trading will cease at 12:55pm, Sunday, week 9.
       Send payment to me.  Email me to get my mailing address.  We are not carrying anyone this year.
     - Please review the Rules
     - Reach out to Karl if you have any problems with the website.  HE HAS ACCESS TO EMAIL AND HE SET 
        UP OUR LINKAGE TO THE MYFANTASYLEAGUE SITE HIMSELF. Just copy me in.

Due to the number of complaints I received concerning the Cunning Linguist victory over the Blood Brothers last week, an internal investigation was performed.  Both teams were cleared of any wrong doing.

No evidence of collusion was discovered.

Week 7
Sun, Oct 25	Time (ET)	Network	DIRECTV	SIRIUS	Westwood One
GB @ CLE	1:00 PM	FOX	708	130 (GB)   126 (CLE)
SF @ HOU	1:00 PM	FOX	709	127 (SF)   91 (HOU)
SD @ KC	1:00 PM	CBS	706	125 (SD)   157 (KC)
IND @ STL	1:00 PM	CBS	707	122 (IND)   151 (STL)
NE @ TB	1:00 PM	CBS	704	121 (NE)   158 (TB)
MIN @ PIT	1:00 PM	FOX	710	123 (MIN)   147 (PIT)
BUF @ CAR	4:05 PM	CBS	711	121 (BUF)   125 (CAR)
NYJ @ OAK	4:05 PM	CBS	712	122 (NYJ)   126 (OAK)
CHI @ CIN	4:15 PM	FOX	705	123 (CHI)   108 (CIN)
ATL @ DAL	4:15 PM	FOX	713	91 (ATL)   158 (DAL)
NO @ MIA	4:15 PM	FOX	714	130 (NO)   127 (MIA)
ARI @ NYG	8:20 PM	NBC		127 (ARI)   126 (NYG)	Radio
Mon, Oct 26	Time (ET)	Network	DIRECTV	SIRIUS	Westwood One
PHI @ WAS	8:30 PM	ESPN	206	126 (PHI)   125 (WAS)	Radio

Byes: Ravens, Broncos, Lions, Jaguars, Seahawks, Titans

Pedro goes 5  for 7 in week VI!  Pedro is now 29 for 42 (690) for the season.  Pedro's week 7 picks are being brought to you by the Marilyn Monroe Estate, not to be confused with Marilyn Manson...

OFFL Spokesmodel	Match Up	Prediction
	vs	58 to 55:  The Well Hungarians
	vs	62 to 53:  Muff Divers
	vs	67 to 66:  Mean Machine
	vs	72 to 60:  Pink Taco Squad
	vs	62 to 44:  10" Allstars
	vs	56 to 40:  Blunt Force**
	vs	50 to 55:  House of Pain

I received this recipe after a threesome where the wife was Italian... Italian-Style Grilled Corn on the Cob

- 4 ears fresh sweet corn, in husks
- 3 to 4 tablespoons olive oil or melted butter
- 1 tablespoon chopped fresh oregano
- 1 tablespoon chopped fresh parsley
- 1/4 cup grated Parmesan cheese
- Salt and Pepper to taste

Soak corn in cold water for 30 minutes, drain.  Meanwhile combine oil, oregano, and parsley and set to the side.

Pull back husks on each ear of corn, leaving the husks attached at base.  Remove corn silk.  Brush corn with seasoned oil.  Fold husks back around the corn, tie at top with string or strip of corn husk.

Place corn in center of cooking grate.  Grill 12 to 14 minutes, turning once half way through grilling time.  Carefully remove husks.  Sprinkle corn with cheese, season with salt and pepper to taste.  Quick, easy, and it beats the monotony of plain corn.

Boobs and Willies

A family is at the dinner table. The son asks his father, "Dad, how many Kinds of boobs are there?"                    The father, surprised, answers, "Well, son, a woman goes through three Phases. In her 20s, a woman's boobs are like melons, round and firm. In her 30s to 40s , they are like pears, still nice but hanging a bit. After 50, they are like onions".                    "Onions?"                    "Yes, you see them and they make you cry."                    This infuriated his wife and daughter, so the daughter said, "Mom, how Many kinds of 'willies' are there?" The mother, surprised, smiles and answers, "Well dear, a man goes Through three phases also. In his 20s, his willy is like an oak tree, Mighty and hard. In his 30s and 40s, it is like a birch, flexible but Reliable. After his 50s, it is like a Christmas tree".                    "A Christmas tree?" "Yes --- dead from the root up and the balls are just for decoration."

A Couple of Women Playing Golf

A couple of women were playing golf one sunny Saturday morning. 
The first of the twosome teed off and watched in horror as her ball headed directly toward
 a foursome of men playing the next hole.
Indeed, the ball hit one of the men, and he immediately clasped his hands together at his crotch,
 fell to the ground and proceeded to roll around in evident agony.

The woman rushed down to the man and immediately began to apologize. She said,
"Please allow me to help. I'm a physical therapist and I know I could relieve your pain if you'd allow."
"Ummph, oooh, nnooo, I'll be all right...I'll be fine in a few minutes," he replied breathlessly 
as he remained in the fetal position still clasping his hands together at his crotch.

But she persisted, and he finally allowed her to help him. She gently took his hands away and 
laid them to the side, she loosened his pants,and she put her hands inside. She began to massage him.
She then asked him, "How does that feel?"

To which he replied, "It feels great, but my thumb still hurts like hell."

Body Pain

A young brunette goes into the doctor's office and says that her body hurts wherever she touches it.
"Impossible," says the doctor. "Show me."
She takes her finger and pushes her elbow and screams in agony. She pushes her knee and screams, 
pushes her ankle and screams and so on it goes.
The doctor says, "You're not really a brunette are you?"
She says, "No, I'm really a blonde."

"I thought so," he says. "Your finger is broken."