THE ROLLINGSKULL, VOLUME 20, ISSUE 252 September 25, 2026 - Music By Van Wonder, Chained Uptight Week Three of the OFFL is here.      -  The Resurrection of Mean Machine      -  WTF Rodger's Witch      -  Why Is Jimmy So Quiet?      -  Catche These Hands and Riders:  Toilet Bowl 2026      -  A Few One Liners      -  Mistress Bianca Is Back     As always, we appreciate your patronage.    E. A. Presley Editor and Chief of the RollingSkull

 

DIDDY TRIVIA:  FOOTBALL KNOWLEDGE FOR THE NEXT 25 YEARS TO LIFE Like Aaron Hernandez, before him-- It took us a while to replace OJ, but at last we found the right guy.  Introducing Diddy Trivia.  While Diddy gets ready for his break out tour, he still has time for some good ole NFL Trivia.  Week one question, "Which NFL quarterback holds the record for the most career game‑winning drives?"  The answer is Tom Brady.   He holds the NFL record for the most career game winning drives, finishing with 58 across regular season and postseason play. A game winning drive is officially defined as a possession in the 4th quarter or overtime where the offense scores to take the lead for good. Brady built this record over 23 seasons, consistently delivering in high pressure moments. His ability to stay calm, read defenses, and execute late game throws made him the league's most reliable closer. Many of his game winning drives came in nationally televised matchups, playoff games, and Super Bowls,  further cementing his reputation as one of the greatest clutch performers in NFL history. This week's question, "Which NFL legend is the only player in league history to rush for 2,000 yards in a season and retire while still at the peak of his career?"   A) Walter Payton  B) Barry Sanders C) Eric Dickerson  D) O.J. Simpson   This week's trivia winners will receive... a front-row cauldron seat to the Rodgers' Witch Experience! Watch live as 20.3 points get conjured out of thin air — truly a disappearing act David Copperfield would envy. Bring the kids, bring the in-laws, bring anyone who's ever wanted to see what a fantasy roster looks like after two straight weeks of black magic gone wrong. Just don't let them near the "Start/Sit" cauldron, whatever's been brewing there (20.300, then 30.650 - a combined 51 points, dead last in the entire league) is not a recipe you want to try at home. Sure, 13 other teams are out there managing their lineups like functioning adults. But why bother with something as trivial as winning when you could be putting on the league's spookiest, least competitive show since... well, ever? Broomsticks up, Witches!  May your Week 3 be less cursed than your first two, though at 51 points through two weeks, the bar is somewhere underground.

Pedro's is 10 for 14 and sits at .714 fore the season.  Here we go with Week III. This week's predcitions are brought to you by this weekends, Battle of the Asses:  SPOKESMODEL                   MATCHUP                              PREDICTION   vs   44 to 60:  Mean Machine   vs   59 to 58:  Midnight Dawgs   vs   43 to 45:  Flying Gators **   vs  50 to 39:  Catch These Hands & L's   vs   61 to 59:  Ball Busters   vs  55 to 50:  Midnight Riders   vs  59 to 49:  Romosexual Tendencies                                                                                                     ** ESTRADIOL GAME OF THE WEEK

MetaConnect 2026 The biggest gadget story this week is easily Meta Connect 2026, which happened Wednesday-Thursday (Sept 23-24) in Menlo Park. Highlights. Meta VR Glasses (formerly Project Phoenix)- the headline reveal Meta announced Ray-Ban Meta Audio, its first glasses without a camera, at $349; Ray-Ban Meta (Gen 3) at $449; and a Ray-Ban Display rollout to Canada, the UK, France, Italy and Germany. But the real centerpiece was Meta VR Glasses, the ultralight headset reported for months as Project Phoenix: about 100 grams on the face, a compute puck on an optical tether, and a price of $1,299.99 when it goes on sale in spring 2027. What it does - Meta's announcement pitches them as a personal cinema, a courtside seat, a workspace and a gaming console, backed by IMAX Enhanced certification, Disney+ movies in 3D from November, and immersive sports from ESPN, including 8K streaming with 180-degree views, plus more than 100 live sports events each year via Meta's partnerships with MLB, NBC Sports, TNT Sports and UFC. Other reveals - a Muse Charm, a dedicated piece of hardware that houses your personal Muse Agent with a small display, speakers, mics and a fingerprint sensor, plus an FDA-cleared hearing enhancement feature at $149.99, cycling and transit directions on the Meta Ray-Ban Display, and a cheaper Meta Adventurer at $249. Basically Meta is betting its whole hardware future on glasses over headsets - no new Quest at all this year, which is a notable shift. Five One Liners What's the difference between a G-spot and a golf ball? A guy will actually search for a golf ball.   Two guys are talking. One says, "My wife's an angel." The other says, "You're lucky, mine's still alive." What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night? A widow Why is a woman like a laptop? Even when fully charged, you still might not get lucky tonight. What's the difference between your wife and your job? After five years, your job still sucks.                                                               Smoked Sausage and Hatch Chile Beer Cheese Dip Recipe Ingredients For the Smoked Sausage and Chillies: 1/2 pound ground hot Italian sausage, casings removed (or bought in bulk), crumbled into large chunks 4 Hatch chile peppers For the Beer Cheese Dip: 1 tablespoon butter 1/3 cup red onion, diced 1/3 cup smoked Hatch chile peppers, diced (from above) 1 cup smoked sausage, broken up (from above) 1 tablespoon flour 1 cup beer (light beers work well, like pilsner, kolsch, amber) 1 cup smoked cheddar cheese, shredded 1 cup sharp cheddar, shredded 1 ounce cream cheese 2 teaspoons Dijon  Instructions To Smoke the Sausage and Chiles: Preheat Smoker:  Preheat the smoker to 250 degrees, I like oak wood for both the sausage and chile peppers. Smoke Sausage:  Place sausage pieces on a baking sheet and place onto the smoker for 60-90 mins or until internal temperature reaches 165 degrees.   Smoke Chiles:  Cut the chiles in half, lengthwise, and remove the stem and seeds. Place directly on the smoker for up to two hours or until soft. You can go longer, but the chile may dry out so be careful. Let cool then dice them up to prep for the dip. You will need 1/3 cup of the diced smoked chiles for the dip. To Make the Beer Cheese Dip:  Heat up butter in a medium-sized saucepan over medium heat, then add the onion. Let soften (about 6 minutes). Add the pre-smoked chile peppers and sausage. Cook together, stirring often, about 4 minutes. Add the flour and stir together for 1 minute as the thickening agent. (You can use cornstarch as an alternative). Add the beer and bring to a simmer, then reduce to low, and then add the cheeses, and Dijon mustard, and let it melt together. Serve warm. Enjoy with chips, baguette slices, or soft pretzels. Notes Optional Toppings:  We love topping with some chopped green onions and pickled peppers. Try pickled jalapenos or if you can find them, Mama Lil's peppers.   Pro Tip:  If you want a char and the skin off the peppers, just put them under a high broiler and rotate every minute until blackened. It won't have the smoky flavor, but will still be delicious.